The 16 step process of true procrastination

1. Turn off your phone/ turn off data on your phone.
2. Turn on a light.
3. Open a book, and your laptop.
4. Block Facebook and Twitter and Pinterest and Tumblr and Instagram and Youtube and Netflix.
5. Open your document/ revision notes.
6. Look at it until your eyes water.
7. Begin crying.
8. Accept inevitable failure.
9. Actually get about 10 words written, and then head to the kitchen for a snack because you've worked so damn hard and deserve a break.
10. Spend an hour and a half talking to your flatmate in the kitchen, before telling them you need to go and get this essay done because you're on a roll.
11. Write another ten words, and delete the other ten you'd already written.
12. Tidy your room, because who can work in an environment like this?
13. Hoover.
14. Sit back down, and tell yourself you have loads of time and don't need to panic (its due tomorrow).
15. Unblock Netflix and begin watching an entire series (perhaps Breaking Bad...) and cry yourself to sleep at night worrying about all the work you have to do.
16. Stay up until 5am, fuelled by Red Bull and the occasional Pro Plus, and finish that essay.

Now get off this blog, and actually do some work!